I can tell how many ‘hit’s I get on each article I post. The one yesterday only got one third as many readers as the one about Burn Remedies and less than one quarter as many as read the one about the German ‘porno’ flick (with full frontal nudity of the 76 year old lover) in case you missed it.

So today I am going to post this blog early so you will all have a chance to read it before you go to sleep.

I read an interesting article in the newspaper this morning. It seems that cursing or swearing when you are hurt really helps to alleviate the pain. This works very well if you hit your finger with a hammer or if you burn yourself.

I am so glad to know this, as I have always ‘sworn like a sailor’ when I hit my finger while hammering. And a burn gets the same treatment.

Gee, I thought cold water and then neosporin did the trick. But no, there was an experiment done at a British university. The test was to see how long one could withstand the pain of having your hand immersed in icy water. This experiment is used as it does not cause any lasting scars or psycological problems.

People were given two choices. One was to say a word with no swearing such as door or chimney and the other choice was to really let loose with a nasty swear word. The saying of the real swear word made a great impact on lessening the pain, while the plain old word did nothing.

I think I knew this, just from experience. In the 50’s we said things like ‘Drat’ and ‘Dog gone it’. I don’t know if these had quite the same effect as the words we use so freely now.

I know I was amazed recently when people on TV say things like, ‘I was really pissed off’. And when Melissa Leo accepted her Oscar for best supporting actress, she actually used the ‘F’ word in front of millions of viewers. Magazines called it ‘dropping the F bomb’.

I remember when my children were growing up, if anyone in our family swore, they had to put a dime in a jar. We kept this jar on the kitchen counter. I don’t recall what we did with the money, but I doubt if we had over $2 in the jar at any one time.

I wonder if now it is OK for kids to swear if they are doing it to alleviate pain from a bump or bruise. And who tells them that this is OK?

When I was a little girl and would say something ‘bad’ or sass my mother, I would get my mouth washed out with soap. I haven’t heard of this practice lately. It probably is considered child abuse and is grounds for arrest.

The way children are punished nowadays is with a Time Out. I’m not sure exactly what this is or what it accomplishes, but it sounds nice. Sort of like sports.

Maybe it is like the punishment we used to have in the forties. Sitting in the corner. There was a chair facing the corner where two walls met, and sitting in this chair was very shameful. But not as bad as, No Dessert.

In today’s paper in the ‘Dear Abby for advice about children’ was something funny. A father wrote in and said he and his wife were having a disagreement on how to ask your children to pick up their toys. He felt that the correct way is to say, “Please, pick up your toys” and his wife said that saying ‘Please’ is ridiculous.

He thought by saying ‘Please’, this would teach the children manners. The answer was, “It is not a request, and so ‘please’ may just confuse the child”. However if you want to say ‘Please’, it is OK.

The advisor gave some alternate choices. “I need you to pick up your toys” and “It’s time to pick up your toys”. Whatever you do, have some colorful plastic bins to put the various toys in by type. Much easier and more fun than one big jumble in a ‘toy box’.

When I was three I had a teddy bear that ‘ate’ graham crackers. His mouth opened and he was lined in tin. At his bottom was a little drawer and you could take the crackers out and do it again. One day I decided that he should have some milk with his crackers, and so I poured a glass of milk down his throat.

When I put him in my toy box I totally ‘forgot’ about his meal. The next day, the smell of sour milk brought my mother running into my room to search for what was causing this. We wound up having to throw away my teddy bear. Boo f——-Hoo.

I was trying to think back to what I said about picking up toys. After all, I had three children under four and I’m sure this was an issue. I think what I said was, “Let’s pick up your toys now.”

Sort of like when you go to the doctor and he says, “And how are WE today?” And I would start picking up a few toys, and after one or two, excuse myself to go ‘fix lunch’ or a ‘snack’. Of course toys in the 60’s were a lot simpler to pick up. Just dolls and little dishes for the girls and trucks, guns and soldiers for the boys

Now there is Lego in all sizes and colors for ages two and up. And with jillions of pieces, you really need many bins and containers just for this one toy alone. Also, Lego is not just for boys anymore. No, now the tiles come in pink and orange as well as red, white and blue.

And if you go to the Lego store, there are tubs filled with every color of the rainbow, in case you are making something that requires just one or two lavender or gold lego pieces. (And the Lego sets cost between $50 and $200 these days).

Also another punishment was ‘Go to Your Room’. Now the kids would be thrilled with that one. Most children have a TV and a computer in their bedroom. So great.

And if they don’t have a TV or a computer, maybe they’ll just have to tough it out and play with their Nintendo or send text messages with their cell phone.