Four years ago I met my boyfriend on American Singles. At that time, it was still considered somewhat of an oddity to actually meet someone and have it ‘work out’.

Now it is much more normal and not something to be embarrassed about. Even seniors are embracing this idea as a way to connect to others. It is difficult to meet someone if you are not in the working force and don’t go to bars.

Sunday February 20 in Lee Cataluna’s column in the Honolulu Star Advertiser was a heartwarming article about a man who found a woman on eHarmony. If you have ever tried to enroll in eHarmony, you know it isn’t easy. You have to answer about 400 questions about yourself before you can even apply.

So imagine the human interest in this article about an 80 year old widower, whose friend talked him into signing up for eHarmony. He lives in a very high class retirement home in Honolulu and is a retired university professor. He was looking for a pen pal and so he didn’t put any restrictions on distance.

When he posted his eHarmony biography, he was inundated with hundreds of responses from all over the world. He was so overwhelmed that he contacted eHarmony and told them to stop sending him email. But he read the last one he received.

It was from a woman in her sixties who had a great deal in common with him, including the fact that she was a widow and also a university professor. The only ‘problem’ is that she lived in Brazil.

Well love will out, as they say. Miraculously they started corresponding, realized that they had so much in common and really enjoyed each other and so finally agreed to meet in Atlanta. The reason for Atlanta is that it is a city that is a ten hour direct flight from both Honolulu, Hawaii and Rio De Janeiro, Brazil.

So, he went to Brazil and she came to Hawaii and they both think they are the luckiest people in the whole world to have found one another. Now he is seriously considering moving to Brazil, as she is still working as a music professor at the University.

Isn’t that an amazing story? It goes to show you that things do work out and if you don’t try something, you will never know.

I know in my case, I was a widow who was retired and had no logical way to meet anyone. When I joined American Singles I did not know what to expect. I don’t like driving long distances at night and so I put a 20 mile radius on my search.

I had four ‘dates from hell’ and was just about to give up, when Boom, I read a biography that was so unique, I just had to respond.

I must say, I am glad I did. I rather sheepishly said I was taken with his biography and philosophy but that I was nine years older than him and if he was bothered by that, I would understand.

Evidently that wasn’t an issue. But when he told me his height and weight, I wasn’t sure if I could handle someone who was four inches taller than me but weighed about the same as I do.

When I voiced this objection, he said women are more hung up about that than men. Really?

I have a girlfriend who is a 76 year old widow. She has joined several dating sites and states her age as 66. She is very popular and has a constant stream of dates. She hasn’t found ‘the one’ yet and the other day she asked me how old my boyfriend thought I was. When I told her, 72, she was floored.

I think it would be very difficult to pull off an age lie and keep everything straight. First of all, what about your 51 year old son and 50 and 48 year old daughters. How could you explain that if you said you were ten years younger than you really were?

If I were 68 and pretended to be 58, that means I would have had all three of my children before I was fourteen. And if I was a virgin when I got married at 19, how does that compute?

And what about high school graduation, and friends you might have in common. And you would have to edit events that may have happened before you were ten.

In my case, if I were pretending to be ten years younger than I am, I would have to eliminate World War II, the Pearl Harbor bombing, my evacuation from Hawaii and growing up with my aunt as my ‘Mother’ due to separation during the war. Then I would be all mixed up as to when I started high school and when I finished.

So even though it is a fact that many people lie on dating sites to make themselves seem more attractive, I still feel that honesty is the best policy. If you decide to join, American Singles or eHarmony, good for you. Have fun and you never know.

If the expense is what is keeping you from giving internet dating a try, there is a free site called Plenty of Fish. There you go, now you have no excuse.